Melbourne’s Eternal Addiction

Posted on February 23, 2013 by Natasha

We’ve all seen them…dusty, dirty, cluttered, crowded and sometimes downright skeevy…tattoo shops. I once accompanied a group of friends to a tattoo parlour in New York City that was open 24 hours a day, sold bongs at the front, had clearly not been swept in months and was so crowded that you could reach out and touch the person getting tattooed next to you. Not the kind of place I would prefer, or recommend, getting ink done.

Perhaps I am about to sound like a tattoo snob, but so be it. If you’re going to have something permanently stamped onto you, more thought should go into it than, “Hmm…I think I might like to get a tattoo today. This place is open, let’s do it.” To me, tattoos should have meaning and should be well thought out. They are pieces of art.

I am not saying that I don’t have any “dumb” tattoos – when I turned 18 I ran to a tattoo shop to get a heart and a star inked onto my skin in a place that is, thankfully, not usually visible. I say thankfully, but I don’t regret them – they are 18 year old Natasha, with me forever. And that is fine with me.

However, for the future, I will stick with the method that I employed on the last tattoo I got, almost 10 years after my first two. I wrote a poem, commissioned an illustrator to draw it, then, after MANY consultations with my friend, Lea Smith, who has been tattooing for years, decided to have it done. Lea is now working at Tattoo Archive, but at the time was tattooing at Trinity Tattoo in Virginia Beach, VA. Trinity Tattoo was everything I believe a tattoo shop should be – an immaculate art space. It was clear that the people who worked there cared for the shop. Any artist not working on skin was drawing on paper. Practicing. Preparing. There was real art hanging on the walls. Tattooists went in and out of each other’s rooms to see what everyone else was working on, perhaps learn something new. It was amazing and it is what I will always look for in a tattoo shop in the future.

Which brings me to a little gem that I recently stumbled upon in Melbourne’s CBD. Eternal Addiction, led by tattoo artist Matthew Kozik, is definitely a spot that I would recommend checking out if you’re thinking about getting work done. For one thing, it is clean – clean, clean, clean! The shop is not cluttered and there are none of those silly racks of posters with examples of barbed wire and dragons on the walls. Instead, hanging on the walls are examples of Matthew’s work, along with art done by the other artists who work there – Smitho, Abby Drielsma, Blake Macpherson and Eugene Pirie.

Eternal Addiction’s shop front.

Inside Eternal Addiction. The jeans are from the shop’s early days when it began as a clothing store/tattoo shop.

While speaking with Kozik about his shop, he told me a story that is all too familiar to me and, likely, anyone else in the beauty industry. As a high school student, his career counselor asked him to write down his top five career choices. Number one on the list was “tattoo artist.” The career counselor crossed it out. Number two on the list was architecture, so that’s how he ended up studying architecture and design in university. (I can not tell you how many of my cosmetology students told me the same story…)

When he was about 20, Kozik started getting heavily tattooed and meeting others who were heavily tattooed as well. Eventually, he was offered an apprenticeship and thus began his career as a tattooist and his path towards owning a shop.

Kozik (left): “Anything you have a passion for, you’re going to do well in…when you enjoy what you do, you spend even your spare time doing it because you WANT to build your portfolio, you WANT to build your career, you WANT to grow as an artist…”

Passion – another thing to look for in a tattoo artist. Nobody wants to get tattooed by someone who doesn’t care or has burned out. Unless, of course, you’re just getting some barbed wire around your arm, then maybe it doesn’t matter. (Wow, I really do sound like a snot!)

The other things that I appreciated hearing from Kozik were that, at Eternal Addiction, the artists do extensive consultations with their clients and that they do NOT reproduce other people’s tattoos. “We do not replicate, no reputable artist would…it’s about respect for other artists and the other people who wear tattoos.” He mentions that I would likely be upset if, after commissioning an illustrator and paying my tattoo artist to ink my own, very personal art onto my body, I saw someone else walking around with a duplicate. Yes sir, you are correct.

They do not even replicate their own drawings onto multiple people. Kozik pointed out a few pieces of his own art that he has tattooed onto clients and explained that he would never put them onto someone else’s body because they have already been used.

So, any Melbournians out there looking to get some custom ink done in a clean, professional environment, I can right here and now recommend that you check out Eternal Addiction. It is an outstanding example of what a tattoo shop should be. And you can rest assured that nobody else will be seen walking around with a duplicate of your skin art.

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Eternal Addiction on facebook.

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Natashadventure on facebook and twitter.

Hairstylist turned chef. Ok, maybe not quite.

Posted on February 1, 2013 by Natasha

Words have not been flowing so easily this week. Not sure why, but it’s time to give this a go again.

Food, walking and reading have been taking up the better part of my days recently. I finished Anthony Bourdain’s Kitchen Confidential a few days ago – a very good read. I found myself relating to him a few times and learning a lot about the food industry.

First, I had to laugh when he wrote about his jobless days: “A few hours earlier, I’d been lying dazed and hopeless in my unmade bed, wondering whether to take another nap or call out for pizza.” Ah, yes. Just before beginning that chapter, I was myself wondering whether to take another nap, start another chapter, or go stuff my face.

Then, about not having the same days off as the rest of the world: “…Never having a Friday or Saturday night off, always working holidays, being busiest when the rest of the world is just getting out of work, makes for a sometimes peculiar world view…” Well, this seems an awful lot like life in a salon.

And, once more, when he was explaining the types of people that work in the food industry: “The business, as respected three-star chef Scott Bryan explains it, attracts ‘fringe elements’…They’re comfortable with the rather relaxed and informal code of conduct in the kitchen, the elevated level of tolerance for eccentricity…” Now, depending on what salon you work in, the vibe may not be informal or relaxed. But there is definitely an excess of ‘fringe elements’ and eccentric people in the hair industry.

I came to Australia to have an adventure. To live overseas for a while. And to try something different. As I have said before, as much as I love the hair industry and appreciate all of the opportunities it has given me, I am restless. Ready for a change. However, I still need to have movement in my day. Sitting at a desk does not suit me. I need to be on my feet, occupied, doing something with my hands. That’s why I thought I would try working in a cafe in Melbourne!

No such luck. Nobody wants to hire and train somebody, from the ground up, that can only hold the same job for a six month period because of their visa restrictions. Maybe it is just this city – Melbournians are ridiculously serious about their coffee.

Anyway, suffice it to say, I have had a lot of time on my hands since I arrived in Australia. And when I have a lot of time on my hands, my imagination runs wild. (Okay, maybe that’s all day, every day.) One of the crazy ideas that I have come up with recently was maybe I could be a chef. Maybe I will own a bistro with my man-friend one day! Okay, okay, let’s bring it back a bit…maybe…maybe…A FOOD TRUCK!

Thus began my search to find a food truck willing to take me under their wing. And you know what? I found one! I have only helped out two days so far, but it has been fun. I have been on register and also in the kitchen. IN THE KITCHEN! I even got my first chef’s cut! And by chef’s cut, I mean food-prep cut. I spent that day preparing basil, parsley and all sorts of herbs as well as shredding cabbage for coleslaw. (The coleslaw shredder is where I sliced my finger.) Kind of proud of it, though – kind of like cutting yourself on your shears for the first time as a hair stylist. A scar to wear proudly!

So, we will see how this goes. Perhaps one day I will attend culinary school. That is, if I don’t get distracted by all of the other things I want to study…photography…literature…journalism…Spanish/Italian/Portuguese/German/Sign Language and all of the other languages that I want to learn…oh, the things we’ve got to cram into our short lives!

(No photos this time – although there are more uploaded to my facebook page!!!)

‘Straya Day.

Posted on January 27, 2013 by Natasha

Yesterday was Australia Day. A celebration of the arrival of the First Fleet in Sydney, Australia, 1788. It’s kind of like our Fourth of July in the States, minus all of the fireworks. Actually, I think there may have been fireworks in the Melbourne CBD, but they weren’t going off on every street corner. Apparently, a lot of people have barbecues on ‘Straya Day, too, but I did not witness any. My housemates went on a bicycle pub crawl. More on that later.

I did run to the city to see the Australia Day parade, though. More to get out of the house and to have something to post about, rather than because I enjoy parades. As quite often happens to me, a Mitch Hedberg quote came to mind while I was on the train into the city: “If you’re watching a parade, make sure you stand in one spot; don’t follow it, it never changes. And! If the parade is boring, run in the opposite direction – you will fast forward the parade!”

And then these guys and gals walked by:

A historical re-enactment group?! You have my attention.

This guy’s mustache?!

Holding my attention.

Now I’m laughing. This is good.

The Wellington/Collingwood Knitting Group? Aw, thinking of home. (Shea and Tara, I am specifically thinking of you two.)

A Tibetan Community in Victoria? Good, good.

Still not bored…OHMYGOD!

The Melbourne Costume Group. THERE IS A MELBOURNE COSTUME GROUP?! Yes, friends. Yes, there is.

And some Doctor Who Fans (I don’t even watch the show, but this made me happy):

And the Star Wars Group:

And then…aaaaand THEN! The VINTAGE CYCLE CLUB OF VICTORIA showed up. Now I’m excited.

There were so many penny farthings, I didn’t know what to do with myself. GLEE! Total glee.

There was also the Roller Derby group and the Ukulele Kollective:

I also happened to capture this Herald Sun photographer taking a photo of this little kid:

History in the making!

There were also various immigrant groups marching. Many fantastic outfits there. But I think this post has become picture heavy enough. I don’t want to break anyones iPhones or something.

Spent the rest of the day reading (Anthony Bourdain’s Kitchen Confidential, if you must know) and waiting for my housemates to make it to the local pub. Which, by some miracle, they did. I was coaxed into 2 schooners while they finished off a healthy number of pitchers. In the name of ‘Straya!

And then I got to watch them cycle home. A good day, I would say.

“Why not go out on a limb? That’s where all the fruit is.”

Posted on January 25, 2013 by Natasha

I have seen the above quote attributed to both Will Rogers and Mark Twain. Sometimes, the internet is confusing. It could even be neither of them. But I like it anyhow.

Today, I am going to fully launch this thing. The blog, the facebook page, the twitter account…may as well go all out if I’m going to do this.

What do I hope to achieve?

Well. A show on the travel channel? Bill Bryson status? Yes, please. But just a blog for now. Baby steps.

I want to share my travels. My adventures. And misadventures. I want to inspire those who dream of an extraordinary life to just go out and make it happen. All it takes is for that switch in your head to go off – for you to realize that all of the societal pressures and material things that surround you are really nothing in comparison to the experiences that you can have in this world – and you are unstoppable.

I had a dream – it was called Australia. I am now living that dream and let me tell you that it is absolutely nothing that I expected. It has been fun, but also downright depressing at times. I have doubted myself many nights. But then I wake up some mornings and marvelous, sometimes peculiar, things happen. And these experiences make the homesickness and dreary, stir crazy days all worth it.

I read travel memoirs constantly. Wild by Cheryl Strayed. Everything ever by Bill Bryson. Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. (I know, I know, bandwagon. I just happened to read the book at a point in my life that I NEEDED to read it. And it really is just a good book, for all of you doubting book snobs out there.) Tales of a Female Nomad by Rita Golden Gelman. Anything by Paul Theroux. Happy Isles of Oceania being my favorite.

What happens in all of these memoirs? Everyone doubts themselves. Nothing goes as planned. At some point, there is despair. Fear. But you know what? Everyone gets something out of their travels. Whether or not they accomplished exactly what they set out to do, exactly how they planned to do it or not (usually not), these people all have extraordinary experiences that surpass anything that could possibly happen in an office cubicle.

And that’s what I want. And that’s what I want for any of you out there who also have the dream…the itch. The inkling that life is so much bigger and better than anything anyone out there is trying to sell to you.

So. Anthony Bourdain has moved to CNN. Samantha Brown has just had twins. It’s my turn now!

Homesickness. Joblessness. And all of the other reasons that I’ve had poop in my pants recently.

Posted on January 22, 2013 by Natasha

Well. I was just about to head to the CBD to do some research. On what, would you like to know? Well, I was going to see if the State Library had any books on museum conservation procedures. Then head over to the Immigration Museum to have a look around. All of this because, first of all, I honestly do find those subjects interesting. But mostly because I had applied for an Assistant Conservationist position with Museum Victoria. It would have been the perfect job for me – finally! A foot in the door with the museum world (my degree is in art history.) The position was a 6 month contract – awesome! Because, on an Australian Work & Holiday visa, that is exactly how long you are allowed to work at one place.

I had even called the woman in charge of hiring. We had a wonderful conversation. And then the HR panel did not pass my resume and cover letter on. C’est la vie.

So, here I am typing up the blog I have been meaning to post instead. I will venture out later.

My sister came to visit me last week and that was amazing.

There she is, being all cute with her coffee at the NGV cafe. We hung around Melbourne for a few days, going to museums, walking and, of course, cooking and eating.

There was also a lot of silliness involved. Because we are sisters.

We then traveled on to Sydney where we stayed at the Bondi YHA. Bondi, and the surrounding beaches, really are beautiful. The weather worked out perfectly for us, as well. 100-104F on Thursday and Friday. Those days were spent at the beach and in the water, as that is the only way to cool off around here. Saturday and Sunday were cloudy and about 75F, so we did our sightseeing on those days.

Oh! And we went to see Alestorm on the last night she was in town. If “Pirate Metal” sounds like an interesting musical genre to you, I suggest you check them out.

I also ate some chicken. You read that right, any of you who know me personally. I tried some chicken. That will have to be another post altogether, though.

My sister headed back home on Sunday and I have had a pretty tough case of homesickness since. I miss my friends and family! And I also miss the security of…you know, having an income. It’s safe to say that I am basically flat broke at the moment. I would go back into the salon world, but something between my power converters and salon tools is not working. My tools literally start smoking. And I am not looking to invest in new ones. Excuses, excuses, I know, I know.

And, while you’re sitting there reading this, wishing you didn’t have to go to work tomorrow, I am here to tell you that you would go stir crazy eventually. I was you a few short months ago. And now, I am losing my mind. But I suppose this is all part of the experience for me. I have had a job and been able to do basically whatever I wanted since I was 15. I guess not having that security and freedom is something that everyone should experience at some point in their lives. Gives you a different perspective on life. Hopefully one day, when I’m settled…somewhere…and I wake up thinking, “God DAMN, I don’t want to go to work today…” I will be able to look back on this experience and roll out of bed with a smile.

Anyway. The universe is trying to steer me somewhere, I’m just not sure where yet. And the sun is shining and I need to get some exercise. And I went to the library today and now have a stack of books on Frida Kahlo, Anthony Bourdain and digital photography that I need to pick through. I guess what I’m saying is that this post has ended.

I will note here, at the end, that, even though nothing has gone as planned and I have experienced some bad luck on the job front, I would not change anything about this. These are all lessons that need to be learned and experiences that need to be had. “It will all come out in the wash.”

Indulgence, Luck and a Little Bit of Melodrama at the Museum

Posted on January 9, 2013 by Natasha

Wow. Where do I even begin with this one? Let’s just say, sometimes the universe is mysterious.

A few days ago, in the middle of reading Sherlock Holmes, I had the urge to do some research on Frida Kahlo. I am sure that something sparked this sudden desire, I simply do not remember what. I was quickly enchanted by Kahlo’s story and decided to put Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s classic on hold so that I could read a biography of the Mexican painter.

Hayden Herrera’s book, Frida: A Biography of Frida Kahlo, seems to be the most popular. But I decided to go with Margaret A. Lindauer’s Devouring Frida: The Art History and Popular Celebrity of Frida Kahlo. According to some reviews, and even Lindauer, Herrera’s book does not accurately portray Kahlo as the strong woman that she was. So, I’ve opted to read Lindauer’s book first, followed by Herrera’s.

Moving along to the first two things that I’ve promised for this post: indulgence and luck. I have been fairly strict with money and diet recently. Whenever I do this, I end up on a bit of a binge later. Or today, ha! Yesterday, after starting my book on Frida, I decided it was a museum day. I made it all the way to the CBD, only to run into this:

Boo! What a random day to be closed. And this was after running around the CBD looking for cafe jobs and being terribly unsuccessful. Suffice it to say, I was down in the dumps at the end of yesterday.

Today, I woke up and decided that I was going to get myself some Mexican food. Today, I was going to indulge! Then, I would try again at the National Gallery of Victoria because I was longing for some museum time. But first, I was going to make some phone calls. After calling around to a few book stores and being informed that they were not hiring “at the moment” (which really means the entire season, come to find out), I stumbled upon an even better job opening. My dream job, really. I called to see if they would be willing to hire someone in Australia on a working holiday. The answer? Yes, please send your resume.

LUCK! But that is all that I am willing to say about that for now, I cannot risk jinxing myself.

After calling Evan, who surely thinks that I am manic at this point (yesterday, I was on the verge of tears from frustration and disappointment, today I was on the verge of tears from excitement and hope) I left for my daily adventures. I decided to check out a recently opened Mexican place called Guzman y Gomez. I went with the “mini” barramundi burrito. It was $6. And this big:

“Mini” is not a joke at this place. The containers to the side are the condiments I decided to take because I had just purchased the world’s tiniest $6AU burrito. I ate an entire container of jalapeños. Which was probably not the best decision…I ended up with some pretty serious heartburn. Which lead me to the frozen yogurt establishment next door. This indulgence was not planned. But my green tea frozen yogurt with cheesecake frosting was certainly delectable.

Green tea cheesecake fro-yo in hand, I continued on my path to the National Gallery of Victoria (NGV.) I passed a man who was sitting on the curb looking quite forlorn and decided to shoot him a smile. Turned out he was homeless and asked very nicely if I had any spare change. He had come from Adelaide and been on the streets in Melbourne for nine days. I said, “Hey, man, I understand, I am low on my luck right now, too. But I have a dollar to spare.” It was my last one. “God bless you and may your luck change, too,” was his response as I walked away.

Finally, I walked through the doors of the NGV. Almost immediately, I was openly weeping. Why do I ever stray from the art world? It is where I belong. I love the way that I feel in a museum. I love the smells, the sounds and, of course, the sights. I love how my heart pounds and the gears inside my head start spinning. I love soaking in the minds of other artists and my own ideas that are sparked by them.

There was even a little bit of Warhol and Rothko:

Suddenly, I was back at my home town museum, the Smithsonian. I know all of the Smithsonian museums like the back of my hand. Again, shedding a few tears.

After making it through the European and contemporary side of the NGV, I ran smack into the Arts of Asia wing. Knowing that, if I were to set one foot into that side of the museum, I would never leave, I decided to put the arts of Asia off until tomorrow. I then headed downstairs for some more grub. (Well…I’d started out the day indulging, why not continue? I will be good tomorrow.) I went with an orange cake and a soy latte. Bad choices for my esophagus, scrumptious choices for my taste buds!

On the way home, I stopped at the library. This is what I came home with:

I suppose it is safe to say that I have jumped on the Frida mania bandwagon for the time being. And I am totally fine with that.

Oh! And remember the homeless man that I gave my last dollar to? On my walk to the gym, I found a five dollar bill with no owner. Today has been my lucky day. And I will be passing that luck to my sister when she arrives in two days by putting that five dollars onto her myki card.

This has become an incredibly long post. Cheers to those who have navigated my ramblings and made it to the end.

-fin-

Big, messy brain dump

Posted on January 6, 2013 by Natasha

Not really sure where I am going with this post…so, bear with me. I am not exactly in the writing mood, but the only way to get any better at it is to practice, practice, practice.

The next few weeks should really be fantastic. My sister arrives in Melbourne this Friday. She will be here for about 9 days. Half will be spent here in Melbourne, the other half in Sydney. I can’t wait to see my sissy-bear!

She leaves on the 20th, and on the 22nd I have tickets to see Against Me! That shall add to the fabulousness of January.

Then…and then! Evan arrives. I think he is trying to surprise me, so I do not know the exact date. “Somewhere in the middle of February” is all I know.

Things are looking up.

I am still only working once a week assisting in a salon. Who knew it would be so difficult to get a job as a barista? A little over a week ago I had two VERY promising trials at a cafe. I was supposed to sit down with the woman who would train me at the end of my shift to discuss my schedule and other paperwork. She then got a call and needed to go help out at another location. Said she would call me at the end of the day. When I had heard nothing by the next day, I called her. She answered, “sorry mate, I know I was supposed to call you yesterday! I actually just got off of a plane, can I call you in about an hour?” That never happened, either. And then the holidays happened in Australia.

They really take their free time here seriously. Which I think is absolutely fantastic. Exactly how I think the whole world should work. You put in your 8 hours, then you have your damn free time. You get your damn vacation time.

But holy shit. I could use a job. I am holding on to the hope that, although the cafe was open for the second half of this week, since nobody had seen my would-be barista trainer since before the holidays, she is still…on holiday. Tomorrow is Monday. Fingers crossed that I will get an affirmative phone call. If not, back to the drawing board.

Again, I could easily get a salon job. But I came here to learn something new. Maybe I have learned something new – what it’s like to be turned down from a job. Not to boast here or anything, but this truly is a new experience for me. I have never been turned down from a job before. Ever. This is a bit frustrating (…a BIG bit frustrating…) and a bit humbling, I suppose.

Anyway, the new housing situation is still going well. The landlords are great. We hang out just enough and I have just enough alone time. Balanced.

Hm.

Other new things I have done/seen/learned:

-Beers on the beach

-I have learned that you can order different types of fish from a fish and chips shop

-Because of above, I have ordered, eaten and learned what the most common type of fish in “fish ‘n’ chips” in Australia is: “flake” aka “gummy shark”…I have eaten shark.

-Apparently, there is no law against females bathing topless in Victoria. I will be getting rid of these tan lines, thank you.

-I have never in my life taken a cold shower. I do not like being cold. However, the other day it was 104F and I sure as shit took a cold ass shower.

-Made one of the ice creams from my previous post – the avocado coconut lime raw ice cream. It tasted like lime. Just lime. So, I added agave, vanilla and a pinch of salt. Still not my favorite, but much better. (Speaking of raw food, this raw pot luck must happen.)

-Sometimes, things just don’t go as planned. Try as you might to steer the universe in the direction you want it to go, sometimes it is YOU who has to change direction. And you’ve just got to give in and open up. I used to watch a certainly unhealthy amount of the Travel Channel. Mostly just Samantha Brown and Anthony Bourdain. Once, Samantha Brown said something along the lines of, “You’ve always got to have a plan B and C. Because sometimes plan A goes wrong. And then sometimes plans B and C go wrong and you’ve got to be okay with going along with plans D, E and/or F.” Well, I thought that I would immediately have a job in a cafe. 2 and a half months later, no dice. WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?! Something. Nothing, maybe. But, nothing has gone as planned and I’ve got to be okay with that and keep on truckin’.

I’m sure that I have had other thoughts over the past few days. If I keep typing, this will turn into an even more jumbled, messy brain dump. So, here, I will bid you adieu. With a few views from my window.

I’ve Made It!!!

Posted on November 12, 2012 by Natasha

Well…it’s been a while.

I spent three lovely days in Wellington, NZ and I promise you that I will be returning to that country. My plans are only becoming bigger and better. Crazier? Whatever you want to call it, but it will surely be interesting.

Wellington is an amazing city. Clean. So clean! Fresh air, in a city! And just…beautiful. It is quiet. Unless one finds the right streets and corners. (Cuba St. is where it’s AT!) Perfect for someone like me. I lean towards the introverted side – don’t get me wrong, I love being around people, but I recharge by having some alone time. So, a city that is not too crowded and has totally quiet areas, but still has spots where all of the people gather, is a place I could totally get used to.

However, I did not spend enough time there and I have waited too long to write this entry about it to say much more. Like I said – New Zealand, I promise that I will be back.

As for now, I am ending my second week in Australia. I did the right thing by choosing to live in a house with two other people, instead of on my own. My introverted self would not have much to say for these two weeks if I had not had house mates to get me out of…the house. Funny enough, the only Aussie living here is away for a few months and subletting her room to a Canadian dude. So, I am living with Steven, the Canadian and Suzy, a Chinese student here in Melbourne. Because of this, I have not yet picked up an Australian accent, but they have been two of the most wonderful house mates that I could have ever hoped for.

Seriously.

I had not even been here an hour and they were already telling me about the different banks and cell services on offer in Australia, and the pros and cons of each. They showed me around town and where to get groceries and other home supplies. It was amazing, I would have never had such a productive first day if it had not been for those two. And for that, I cannot thank them enough. We have also done a lot of site seeing together, it really has been wonderful! I can’t wait to see what the rest of the year brings for me.

And now for some photos:

The Philippines or How I Began to Conquer My Fears

Posted on October 23, 2012 by Natasha

October 16^th, 2012…simultaneously one of the best and worst days of my life. I left home for my grand adventure on October 3^rd, and, as difficult and bittersweet as that was, the really tough part was the day that I left for the Philippines – October 16^th. Up until then, yes, I was missing my friends and family back home, but I was visiting other friends and family in the States. One of the superwomen in my life, Dannie, in Austin, TX. An aunt and uncle of mine – Madeleine and Chuck – in Northern California after that. My boyfriend, Evan, came during the second half of my California visit and to see me off on my last night. (I will note here, so that you all know how amazing he is: my flight left for the Philippines at 1:50am and his flight back home left at 7 something in the morning. With security and all that, I left his side around 11:30pm and, poor, wonderful, amazing Evan slept in the airport that night. Just so he could watch me walk away. Ah, love.)

So far, October had been a month of sadness, goodbyes and a little bit of anxiety, mixed with excitement. But October 16^th…oh, October 16^th. That day was filled with the breathless feeling that this was it, I was leaving my comfort zone, for real. Evan and I went to dinner alone and could barely eat. I tried to keep it light because it wasn’t quite time to say goodbye yet, but the impending trip to the airport hung in the air as dense as the smog in L.A. (Have you seen that shit? Good god!) After dinner, we drove back to my aunt and uncle’s house to start packing. And THAT’S when panic struck. Oh my god, the Philippines. Dengue fever, malaria, political tension, flooding, earthquakes, crime…I had no idea what I was getting myself into. The fear of the unknown combined with my imagination can be a disastrous mixture. I had never been to an Asian country before and, although I would be meeting a friend there, I was essentially going alone and I had no visual image to rely on. Of course, my mind was focused on all of the things that could possibly go wrong.

I expressed my fear to everyone I talked to that night. And I would like to thank here all of those who reassured me. Evan, Madeleine and Chuck all got to see me in full panic mode – not pretty. I even bought a calling card so that I could try to get a hold of my friend in the Philippines to make sure, one more time, that it was safe for me to go. I was unable to reach her. So, I gathered my things and off we went to San Francisco International Airport. Once I made it through security and waved goodbye to Evan one last time, my mind found the sort of quiet calmness that I am hoping comes in the moments before death. (DRAMA!) Acceptance of your fate. I was getting on that plane and there was nothing I could do about it. I just let myself be led like a lamb through the boarding process.

All things considered, the 14 hour flight to Taipei was not all that bad. I had requested an aisle seat, but was moved to a center seat. Thankfully, the old lady next to me and I had the same size bladders and every time I thought I needed the restroom, or just to stretch, she was already up. I was also able to sleep through most of it. I landed in Taipei and then in the Philippines without any problems. And once I sighted my friend through the customs window, my fears started to melt away.

As I am writing this, I have only a few days left here in the Philippines. I am so glad that I came and would once again like to thank all of those people who reassured me – this really has been a wonderful experience. I now have a visual to connect with unknown places, so next time I will hopefully be less apprehensive. Then there are all of the things that I have done here so far that I will no longer be fearful of – pulling apart and eating a whole (head still on, bones still in) fish, riding a 600 meter zip line, no toilet paper. (Ok…I can’t say that I have conquered that fear…I have merely learned to pocket paper towels and tissues everywhere I go…) I will say goodbye to the Philippines in a few short days, but will forever carry this trip in my mind as a fresh start and a place that I remain curious about.